Okay, this time I am using my blog to ask for advice :)

I thought I had gotten over something a long time ago but I have realised that is not the case - I still rely on boys compliments and attention to feel good about myself. I wish it wasnt true as I know boys arent the be all and end all, yet it makes me feel good about myself to have boys attracted to me.

I will drunk text boys even the ones I dont like in that way just to receive some flirting.
I have kissed boys I dont like just because I dont want to say no to someone as I know how it feels.
I don't sleep around but this need to feel wanted means I have gotten into some situations I wish had never happened.
It is why I went back to my ex for two years even though he never appreciated me.

I dont want to be this way. Yet I dont know how to get out of it.

obstacles

Although almost recovered, life seems to like throwing me obstacles. And by that I mean difficult situations that could re-start my anorexia. Luckily now I know anorexia does not give me what I need or want.

Yes life can be hard but by dealing with the obstacles you become a stronger person.

Anorexia gives you a death sentence; recovery gives you opportunities.

Once more I am faced with a problem. A major problem at that. I need to finally get over an ex boyfriend. After two and a half years he has completely knocked my confidence until I don't know who I am anymore. Sound familiar? Yeah he's like anorexia. And I sure as hell managed to beat her! Realising this has made me much more positive that I won't only just find rachel again, I'll be an improved stronger Rachel :)